I hate to admit this, but I was an addict
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I was an addict… Addictive behaviors can manifest in many ways and they did for me, Reader. First, I was addicted to exercise. I remember about 7 years ago when I was still in my disordered behaviors my family and I were going on vacation to Mexico. Vacations made me anxious because I didn't have a gym or way to exercise. So guess what I did….👀👀👀👀 I woke up at god-forsaken hours to do a YouTube workout to burn the calories I anticipated eating to ease my anxiety Some of you may relate to that, some of you may be like why the fuck would you be addicted to exercise I hate it so much. I can relate to you both My addictive behaviors didn't just show up in my “discipline” for working out 🤦♀️ I soon became addicted to numbing my brain with a binge 🤦♀️The high of planning a new diet or workout plan after failing..again 🤦♀️Then came the highs and lows of an abusive relationship 🤦♀️ Some antidepressants made their way in there too I blamed my anxiety for SO FUCKING LONG. It was my scapegoat for all of the bad habits I had created myself because I didn't want to look in the mirror and take accountability for my own shit. So rather than looking for your new way out. Look in the mirror Give her grace because she deserves some, but, do not let her make excuses to sabotage your desired future self. When you stop looking for external things to make you happy, you look in the mirror and are proud of who you see, rather than trying to escape. If you need more help on your hormone healing journey check out my socials! Or if you are ready to take the leap and work together, fill out a coaching application here;) |
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